Beware the breadcrumbs of betrayal.
Evidence of a philandering partner isn’t always as obvious as a pair of strange panties on the floor, according to one seen-it-all sexpert.
Bhavna Raithatha, a psychotherapist in the United Kingdom, is sounding the alarm regarding the subtle signs that your soulmate could be having an affair — including erectile dysfunction, a suddenly increased appetite for sex, excessive phone use and a shorter-than-usual fuse.
Contrary to popular belief, for example, cheating spouses won’t necessarily say no to nooky, per Raithatha, who is accredited by the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy.
One would think that the offenders would have a lower sex drive, after ostensibly fulfilling their carnal desires on the side.
However, sometimes they seek to have it off with their other half even more because an affair increases libido to the point that they “become like a Duracell bunny,” the sexpert told the Daily Mail.
“Partners, who may temporarily feel guilty about this, redirect this heightened sex drive towards their current partner,” the extramarital sex sleuth declared. “But it may just be a physical release to release tension — not emotional.”
Often times, a woman scorned can tell if her spouse is cheating during sex — as they tend to go on autopilot without any “eye contact,” Raithatha explained.
Conversely, as many experts have pointed out, spontaneously losing interest in intimacy can be a red flag as well — especially if one’s sex life was good before.
“For men, especially, they can experience a form of erectile dysfunction, because the emotion just isn’t there so they won’t be able to get it up,” the sexpert explained. “They will suddenly start making excuses to not have sex, and the reason is because they want to be loyal to their new person.”
Another indication of infidelity? If one’s paramour is addicted to their phone.
Now, might be hard to distinguish this from a normal phone addiction given our digitally-saturated society, but Raithatha claims that unfaithful spouses spend “so much extra time on them to the point where they’re paying no attention to their partner.”
In fact, the paramour might go from leaving their phone out all the time to taking pains to hide it or suddenly inputting a passcode.
Professional “honey trapper” Madeline Smith claimed that guilty guys will often leave their phones face down while watching TV or eating out.
But be careful how you go about confronting them because this emotional distance can make cheaters quick to anger, per Raithatha.
“I’ve also had a couple of clients who have then challenged their partners on this and they’ve become almost physically aggressive,” she said. “When they start slamming doors or putting their fists through plasterboard and become threatening, it’s to frighten you to stay quiet.”
Then there’s romantic gaslighting, defined by Raithatha as projecting one’s guilt onto the victim.
“They are the ones in the wrong having the affair, but they’re blaming you,” she explained. “They’re putting you under the microscope.”
“They may say things like: ‘”Oh you smell nice, you’re dressing nice, you’re eating better, why is that? Who is that for?” added Raithatha, adding that this inquisition is often done in front of the guy’s friends.
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