In 2022, after studying abroad for four years, Anh, then 27, returned to Ho Chi Minh City to work. One evening she and a friend visited a South African restaurant that had just opened.
Cawood Matthew Blaze, the 28-year-old owner, was preparing to leave for the day, but, seeing customers arrive, stayed behind to introduce the menu. Noticing that Anh was sitting directly in the path of the air conditioner’s airflow, Blaze quietly picked up the remote and adjusted the temperature.
The small act of consideration, combined with the unique flavors of the food, left an impression on here. Upon returning home, she went to Google Maps and left a five-star rating along with a few positive comments to encourage the business.
Two days later she received a thank-you message from Blaze along with an invitation for coffee. He recalls: “I was impressed by her confident demeanor the first time we met. Reading her sincere review gave me an even better feeling about her.”
Blaze proposing to Mai Anh at a restaurant in Ho Chi Minh City in 2024. Photo courtesy of Le Mai Anh |
Initially she had only intended to meet him casually, a possible new friend in a new city, but the date over wine lasted longer than expected as they found common ground in their childhood stories and journeys toward independence.
Blaze was born into a Catholic family in South Africa. Family hardships forced him to grow up quickly, and he began working part-time at the age of 14. Despite having a steady job, he decided to pivot and move to Vietnam to start a business.
In Anh, a girl who had worked for an NGO in the U.K. but gave it all up to return home to be near her parents, Blaze saw a modern woman who still cherished family values.
Their affection grew through shared sports sessions and a healthy lifestyle. Blaze won her over not just through personal acts of care but also how he treated those around him.
When the restaurant was quiet, he would often chat with the staff about their future goals. When he learned that the daughter of the restaurant’s cleaner was sick, Blaze went to their home to visit and offer support. “That kindness made my heart flutter,” Anh admits.
However, as their feelings deepened, Anh felt torn. She had abandoned her career in the U.K. to be close to her parents, and now hitching up with a foreigner meant her future in Vietnam was unclear.
Her parents too worried their only daughter would be affected by the geographical distance and language barrier and sought to speak online with him before an official introduction.
Blaze prepared for the meeting as thoroughly as for a job interview. He practiced answering difficult questions. But when faced with his future in-laws, he chose to speak honestly about his feelings and made a commitment: “If Mai Anh wants to return to Ha Long, I am ready to move with her.”
Trust was truly established when the two families spoke via video call.
“Observing the way Blaze’s parents spoke and the happiness in their family, I believed my son-in-law was raised with kindness,” Bui Thi Tam, 52, Mai Anh’s mother, says.
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Mai Anh and Blaze take wedding photos in 2024. Photo courtesy of Anh |
Their wedding took place in 2024, two years after they started dating. But a multicultural marriage is not always plain sailing: Three months after the wedding she was shocked when he said, “I need some time alone.”
Accustomed to close-knit togetherness, she feared he had stopped loving her, but understood after frank conversations that personal space is not a sign of distance for westerners. She learned to respect his personal time, using it to practice yoga and care for herself.
The next challenge came when Anh became pregnant. To keep his promise, he moved with her to Ha Long to live with her family. He was a bit overwhelmed by Vietnam’s communal culture in which doors are always open and relatives visit without notice.
Anh acted as a cultural bridge as tried to integrate. His parents-in-law support them hugely with childcare, something rarely seen in the west. After one year of marriage Blaze has grown to love the closeness of a Vietnamese family.
The couple occasionally reminisce about that fateful dinner. “I gave five stars just to encourage a stranger, never expecting it would bring me a family,” Anh says.
Video on the life of the Vietnamese-South African couple
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