A strong and happy relationship is the end goal for every marriage, and a new survey found that there might be one simple nighttime habit that can make that goal much more of a reality.
No matter how hard a couple tries, their schedules won’t sync up perfectly. This can sometimes leave them feeling they lack structure in their partnership. But the survey found that making an effort to create a routine with your partner can be very beneficial.
A survey found that married couples are happier when they go to bed at the same time.
The survey, which was conducted by Talker Research and commissioned by Avocado Green Mattress, asked 2,000 married Americans how they felt about the so-called “bedtime gap” in their relationship. The results showed that couples were indeed happier when they had more nights that they went to bed at the same time.
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The couples who said they were “very happy” usually went to bed at the same time about four nights out of the week, while those who said they were “less-than-happy” only went to bed together about once a week. Based on these findings, it’s clear that even the couples who make a concerted effort to go to bed together can’t make it work out every single night. Still, spending more nights together does lead to higher relationship satisfaction.
Overall, 58% of the survey participants said they “felt closer to their spouse” when they went to bed together. That’s a pretty significant number, and it illustrates just how much of a difference going to bed at the same time can make.
Of course, it’s not possible for every couple to go to bed at the same time, and that doesn’t mean they can’t have a solid relationship.
The survey also examined how being a night owl or an early bird could affect a relationship, since this would mean the couple would likely go to bed at different times. 71% of couples who were both night owls and 78% of couples who were both early birds reported they were “very happy,” compared to just 59% who said they felt the same way with one night owl and one early bird in the relationship.
Laura Scott, the director of brand marketing at Avocado Green Mattress, noted that this doesn’t mean couples who have different habits have to settle for unhappiness. “Should night owls only marry other night owls, and should early birds only marry other early birds?” she asked. “No. There are plenty of ways to make a relationship work when you have different needs and varying sleep schedules, something so many couples are familiar with.”
Still, it seems that couples who go to bed at the same time are not only happier, but also sleep better.
Behavioral scientist Michelle Drouin, PhD, and her colleague, Dr. Brandon McDaniel, conducted a similar study on a much smaller scale. Their survey of 289 Americans in relationships showed that many were dissatisfied because their partner went to bed at a different time or spent time before bed watching TV or something similar without them. Some reported that this made them feel “miserable.”
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There are benefits to going to bed at the same time beyond just feeling like you have a stronger bond, though. It also helps couples sleep better. In the Talker Research survey, 43% of respondents said they felt like they slept better when they went to bed at the same time as their spouse. Clinical psychologist Dr. Sabrina Romanoff, PsyD, confirmed that “sleeping next to a partner promotes better sleep.”
Going to sleep at the same time just isn’t possible for every couple, and that’s OK. However, if a couple really does try to go to bed together, they’ll experience health benefits, as well as a stronger relationship. If you can make it work, it sounds like it’s definitely worth a try.
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer with a bachelor’s degree in English and Journalism who covers news, psychology, lifestyle, and human interest topics.
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