Psychedelic journey changed Mary Pauline Lowry’s view of motherhood and helped her write her new novel

Author Mary Pauline Lowry says she wasn’t looking for a story when she decided to take psilocybin mushrooms. She was looking for relief.

After a difficult stretch marked by grief, anxiety, and a crippling case of writer’s block, the novelist traveled to Santa Cruz, California, where psilocybin has been decriminalized, hoping the guided experience might help her reconnect with her creativity. Instead, she walked away with something she never expected: a completely new perspective on motherhood.

In a personal essay published by PeopleLowry recalled that the experience took an emotional turn as she began thinking about the women in her life who were raising children. Rather than focusing on her own struggles, she found herself overwhelmed by empathy for friends and family members balancing parenting with careers, financial pressures, and everyday responsibilities.

“My gratitude for my reliable birth control,” she wrote, “was followed by a deep and profound empathy for every woman I know with children at home.” The realization surprised even her.

Lowry explained that she had entered the experience hoping to overcome creative paralysis after months of personal and professional setbacks. Instead, she found herself reflecting on how demanding modern motherhood has become, especially in the years following the pandemic, when many parents were left juggling work, childcare, and emotional exhaustion with little support.

Ironically, that emotional breakthrough became the key to unlocking her next book.

Once she returned home, the writer discovered that the panic she usually felt whenever she opened her laptop had disappeared. In its place came a flood of ideas, eventually leading to Last Night Was Killera comedic thriller centered on a single mother who unexpectedly finds herself caught up in a murder mystery after discovering a dead body in the trunk of her car.

As she worked on the novel, Lowry said she spent more time talking with friends about both the challenges and joys of raising children. Those conversations, filled with funny parenting stories and honest confessions about exhaustion, helped shape the emotional core of the book.

While writing from the perspective of a mother was new territory, she said the process deepened her appreciation for experiences she has never lived herself. At the same time, it reinforced that remaining child-free was still the right choice for her own life.

Lowry believes every family benefits from having someone who can step in without carrying the daily responsibilities of parenthood. She describes herself as that person—the dependable aunt who has the time and energy to help when needed while still embracing an unconventional life of her own.

Last Night Was Killer arrives on July 7 and marks another chapter in Lowry’s career, which has included the novels The Roxy Letters and Wildfire. Known for blending humor with deeply personal themes, the author says her latest book owes its existence to an unexpected journey that transformed not only her creative process but also the way she sees the people around her.