Vietnamese woman nurses South Korean husband back from the brink

“It was a miracle,” the 36-year-old from Dong Thap Province in the Mekong Delta says.

Jeong, 50, suffered a serious accident in September last year, and doctors gave him only a 1% chance of survival. No one in the family believed he would make it, except for My.

The couple met through a friend in the spring of 2013.

At that time My was an accountant in HCMC and Jeong was an IT engineer in Busan. Three months after they first got to know each other he flew to Vietnam, and they fell in love at first sight and got engaged before getting married.

My moved to South Korea to join her husband during the Mid-Autumn Festival that same year.

“I didn’t know the language and was alone in a foreign country,” she recalls. “At the same time there were many reports of Korean husbands being abusive toward foreign brides, which made my family very worried.”

But Jeong was a good family man. He enrolled My in Korean language and professional skill courses so she could quickly adapt to life there. In winter he would buy her the warmest coats and gloves while he himself wore second-hand clothing.

When their son Min Ho was born in 2014 Jeong took on all financial responsibilities so that My could rest more, and spent his free time entirely with his wife and son.

“We had a peaceful and happy marriage,” My says.

Tragedy struck the family last year when boarding the subway Jeong slipped and fell back, hitting his head on the floor and passing out.

On receiving the news My rushed to the hospital and collapsed at the emergency room door when she heard that her husband had a traumatic brain injury and a poor prognosis, and needed immediate surgery.

“My heart felt like it was breaking. I could barely breathe, and my hands were shaking,” she recalls. “I could not even hold the pen to sign the papers and had to ask my husband’s brother to do it.”

At that time South Korea was experiencing a severe shortage of doctors due to strikes, and so the family had to wait for three hours for the surgery.

That night Jeong also had a brain hemorrhage, which required another surgery.

The next day the doctor called the family and advised them to prepare for the worst, saying Jeong’s chances of survival were just 1%. His despairing mother prepared funeral wreaths and messages to inform family and friends, and selected a photo for the memorial. But My refused to accept the loss of her husband so easily.

“As long as he still has breath, I won’t give up,” she told her mother-in-law.

They waited another 10 days as he remained in intensive care. My was allowed to visit him for 20 minutes each day though she could only touch his hand and pray.

The following week she was amazed when she saw signs that her husband’s eyes were opening. He blinked and looked at her, tears flowing down his face.

“Don’t worry, I will never leave you,” My told him.

Jeong underwent another tracheotomy while still in a vegetative state. My almost moved into the hospital to be with him. She would draw his mucus, wash his body, monitor his vital signs, administer medication, and then go home to take Min Ho to school, bathe him and make dinner.

Exhausted and lonely, she was working more than 12 hours a day. She asked her mother to come from Vietnam to help, but she could only help My briefly since her visa was for just three months.

Months passed and My’s in-laws watched as she worked tirelessly but Jeong showed no signs of improvement. Her brother-in-law suggested transferring Jeong to a nursing home for better care instead of continuing with the ineffective treatment. If they chose that path, My and Min Ho would also receive a large insurance payout that would secure their future.

“I love you, but both you and Min Ho still have a long life ahead,” her mother-in-law told her.

But once again My refused to accept.

She had fully embraced what her mother had told her before she left for South Korea: When two people are married, they are together for life, and they should never leave each other.

Moreover, she pointed out, their son was growing up and becoming aware of things and would learn how she treated his father.

“I have had a wonderful husband for 10 years, I can’t leave him,” she says.

At the same time her family in Vietnam kept calling her to encourage her, saying her younger brother was about to graduate from university and had secured a job. Her parents were still working as well, and they told her: “Can’t four adults support a child?”

“Even if we have to sell our property, we must take care of him [Jeong],” My’s mother told her.

(From L) Le My, her husband Jeong Yeon Hong, and their son Min Ho at a hospital in Busan, South Korea, Oct. 2024. Photo courtesy of My

Earlier this year Jeong began to regain consciousness though he still could not speak. He underwent regular physical therapy sessions to improve his balance, speech, vision, color recognition, and muscle flexibility.

My would remain by his side, helping the doctors lift her 95-kg husband onto the exercise machine.

But a few weeks later Jeong suffered from another critical condition and had to be rushed to the emergency room with a high fever. The doctors said that he could only do light therapeutic activities and that would take much longer for him to recover.

While at the hospital My diligently learned medical terms in Korean to better communicate with the doctors. During the family therapy sessions the doctor encouraged her to motivate her husband, and My vowed then that she would never let anyone see her cry again.

Every day she would tell Jeong cheerful stories such as how Min Ho was doing at school, the weather outside or updates about neighbors and relatives. He could not respond, but would blink to let her know he was listening.

Knowing that Korean men are proud and feel guilty if they have to rely on their wives and children for care, she would tell him about what she had been doing on her own such as completing the procedure of applying for their business license and attending parent-teacher meetings to reassure him that her life was fine.

Her efforts were rewarded with Jeong’s health gradually improving. His eyes, which had been diagnosed as permanently damaged, started functioning normally again. His hands began to move with strength, and he was in the process of relearning to eat.

In mid-November the doctors assessed his recovery as rapid and promising. He was able to have his urinary catheter removed after being attached for a year. His awareness had also returned fully whereas, typically, in such cases, there is complete memory loss.

“As long as he’s alive for even one day, that will be the most complete day,” My says.