Sonia writes that Indira hugged her and her eyes were also red and swollen.
New Delhi. Former Congress President Sonia Gandhi has publicly shared for the first time the deep pain of losing her first child in her book 'Belonging: A Journey of Love'. He told that his son, born two months prematurely in January 1969, died after just a day. The newborn was buried by her husband Rajiv Gandhi and brother-in-law Sanjay Gandhi at the farmhouse of her father-in-law Firoz Gandhi in Mehrauli, Delhi.
This memoir, published by HarperCollins, hit the market on Tuesday. In this, Sonia has shared in detail her emotional memories related to the birth of her son on January 18, 1969 and his death the next day. Sonia writes that one morning in September 1968, the news of her pregnancy brought a wave of happiness in the Gandhi family. The usually solemn Indira Gandhi hugged her, kissed her and said happily, a big baby, about to give birth to another baby!
However, this family happiness could not last long. Sonia gave birth to a son about two months ahead of schedule through normal delivery. He wrote that he heard the baby's first voice while it was being placed in the incubator. Later Rajiv took them to see the child. He was a very small, but fully developed child, with thick black hair and long, thin fingers.
Rajeev and I cried a lot
He wrote, We both kept looking at him. Rajiv's hand was on my shoulder. We fell in love with her at first sight. However, doctors had expressed apprehension about the child's survival. According to Sonia, at around 6.30 in the morning, Rajiv gave her the very sad news that the child was no more. She wrote, I kept asking again and again, no, this is not possible! Why, why? We were both shocked and heartbroken. We held each other tightly. I cried profusely and Rajeev also cried a lot.
Indira left the tour midway after hearing the news of his death.
Indira Gandhi was out of the city at that time. As soon as she got the news of her son's death, she left her tour midway and reached the hospital. Sonia writes that Indira hugged her. His eyes were also red and swollen. She sat with him for a long time. After this, the family faced difficulties regarding the last rites of the child. According to Sonia, in Hindu tradition, the newborn baby is not cremated, but there is a tradition of floating it in the river. It was not possible to bury him even in Christian and Parsi cemeteries. Sonia wrote that she found the idea of floating the child in the river unbearable. He remembered the sight of a dead body at Okhla Barrage, which was being scratched by stray dogs near a garbage dump.
Child buried in Feroze Gandhi's farmhouse
He wrote, I said, no! No matter what happens, I will not let my child be washed away in the river. It was unbearable for them to even imagine that this could be done to their little child who had lost his chance at life. Ultimately, it was decided to bury the child in Feroze Gandhi's farmhouse in Mehrauli. According to Sonia, Rajiv and Sanjay buried the child by digging a grave on the left side, deep inside the boundary wall, under a beautiful bush of pink bougainvillea. He wrote that for a long time, whenever he went there, he used to keep a flower at that place.
Suffered prolonged depression after losing child
Sonia told that she did not have any special problem during pregnancy. Indira Gandhi took care of his diet, walks and exercise. However, after losing the child she struggled with depression, inferiority complex and guilt for a long time. During this difficult period, an article published in a right-wing opposition newspaper deepened his wounds. The article reportedly said that Indira Gandhi had failed to become a grandmother to an illegitimate child. Sonia wrote that these words left a deep wound on her heart. He did not understand how such cruelty could be done to someone. With time the cloud of sorrow gradually began to dissipate. In October 1969, Sonia informed Rajiv that she was pregnant again. She was happy, but there was also apprehension in her mind. After this, on June 19, 1970, she gave birth to Rahul Gandhi.